Confessions of a Recovering Pharisee

[Chicago Tribune]

Anyone who has ever proudly carried Junior’s papier-mache heart into the science fair—only to run into the cardiologist’s kid with the medical school model—has seen what happens when the line between parental involvement and parental takeover gets crossed.

Science fair season is in full swing, but meddling by mom and dad is not limited to budding scientists. It spans childhood, from the Cub Scouts Pinewood Derby to college essays. Parents may try to help a struggling child, allow a perfectionist streak to get the best of them or get carried away by their own interest in the topic. But one way or another, dad’s or mom’s work gets turned in, giving the student an unfair advantage.

In response, several school districts are opting for more in-class assignments, studying the meaning of grades and flat-out reminding parents not to do their child’s homework.

“It’s so tempting to get overly involved,” said Tom Hernandez, a spokesman for the Plainfield public schools and the father of an 8th grader and a high school sophomore. “Your child is a reflection of yourself … so we’re all very invested. But it’s a delicate balance.”

Vernon Hills parent Barb Rosenstock admitted that she once helped her son build a project for a school assignment. In her defense, she said, it was on magnetic electricity.

“It had to light up and be magnetic,” Rosenstock said. “Come on. They’re in 2nd grade.”

Her son wanted to build a hockey game, so Rosenstock helped him affix magnets to the bottoms of figurines and rig a light that illuminated when the puck hit the goal.

They proudly took it to school only to find an even more impressive “parent project” displayed alongside theirs.

“They literally had a walking, talking teddy bear. They had made a circuit chip. A circuit chip! You’re talking about 2nd graders,” Rosenstock recalled with a laugh.

To be sure, today’s parents aren’t the first to be heavy-handed. But teachers say the help seems to be escalating for a host of reasons, not the least of which are the push for parental involvement and the pressure to get into good colleges.

Read more here.

[From me]

How timely! We, I mean my kids just took their Parent –Science Projects to school this morning.  Can someone explain what good they do students? I was horrible in Science.  If I didn’t have Science on my ACT I would have had academic scholarships. I have never used my Science Projects in real life.  I’ve used English, Spelling, Math and History everyday.  But never have I used Science Projects.  I think there is way too much time and money used on these projects.  I would rather the time be spent on my children to help them communicate and learn skills that they will use in real life like computers and other technologies. 

My children did the vast majority of their projects, but there is no way they could have done it on their own. I feel for those children who don’t have parental help.

What do you think?

The Bowl Championship Series (BCS) is major College Football’s answer to a National Championship. The only problem is it doesn’t work. Every other college sports settle the National Championship on the field, court or ring.  But the Presidents of the major colleges decided to keep the “BOWL” system with a twist.  The Call it the Bowl Championship Series. 

I call it a joke.  Now, I’m going to tell you up front I’m a fan of the University of Alabama.  I really should have nothing to complain about.  Bama is #1 in the BCS right now and if they win the rest of their games they will stay number 1. But here is my beef with the BCS.  It has become a “Beauty Pageant.” You ask how?  Well, all you hear on ESPN, Fox Sports, and all of the sports magazines talk about “STYLE POINTS.”  In other words it doesn’t matter if you win–it is how much you win by!  But as Herm Edwards, the coach of the Kansas City Chiefs said, “You play to win the game.”  If you win that is what should matter, not by how much or how little.

Alabama is the only major college team that is undefeated.  I realize Ball State and Utah are too but they are left out because of “Style Points.”  Now as long as Bama was dominating Clemson and Georgia, the voters jumped Bama in the polls.  But now there are teams who have lost at least one game that are actually getting first place votes in the the polls.  One team got two first place votes that lost to a team Alabama beat. Now Bama may lose this Saturday to cross state rival Auburn or Florida in the SEC Championship game.  That is why they play the game.  

But it is time that Division I college football teams start a playoff.  Don’t give me the excuse of classes.  Division I-A, Division II and III have playoffs.  Every other sport has playoffs.  Division I football has become glorified figure skating and gymnastics.  Now, those are great athletic events but the winner is subjective.  That is what the BCS has become.  A voter may have a beef against a coach and not vote his team where it deserves.  That is why they play the game. Auburn a team I certainly don’t pull for got the shaft a few years ago when they went undefeated in the SEC and still didn’t get to play for the National Championship. It is like the Russian Judge in figure skating!

So College Presidents, it is time for a real playoff using the all of the major conferences and  Notre Dame.  If every conference had a playoff like the SEC, Big 12, ACC, Big East, etc… then the winner from those games would automatically be in the playoff.  Then have some at large teams and have a 16 team playoff! 

What do you think?

Today on OCTOBER 31st I went to pick up our children from school.  I usually flip from ESPN radio and the local Christian stations based on the music or if I like the topics on ESPN radio.  Then I heard something I couldn’t believe.  On OCTOBER 31st, the local Christian radio station was playing Silent Night.  Then every song is Christmas music.  They even had a commercial saying that if you want to listen to the regular music you have to have an HD receiver.  Uggh!

How many times have I heard Christians complaining about the commercialization of Christmas?  It doesn’t help when Christian radio stations bypass Thanksgiving.  Who wants to listen to Christmas music for 55 days? Needless to say I will never listen to that station again because we will be moved by the time they start playing regular music again. 

Also, while I’m ranting… Christian music stations are not geared towards men either.  The music is usually wimpy and the DJ’s talk towards women.  We need some manly Christian stations that will play some Pillar, Skillet and even some Switchfoot.  

What do you think?

Probably one of my biggest pet peeves is the “CHURCH POLICE.”  What are the Church Police?  They are Church people who feel it is their God given call in life to criticize every ministry that is different than theirs. They appear differently depending on if they are attacking their own pastor or if they are attacking some other pastor.

When we started our church in Atlanta, my friend Jason Burns made an interesting observation.  He said the only people who will call you in regards to our mailings will be those who disapprove of our new church. Boy was he right!  I received dozens of calls from people wanting to know what we believed.  I finally got smart and put our statement of beliefs on our website.  I never received criticism from people outside the church.  I have always received the worst tongue lashing from those inside the church.  What happened to grace?

One man, who is probably still lurking today even though I’m not his pastor anymore actually printed out all that had said over a year on my blogs and others!  Who has that much time?  He didn’t like the fact that I read Mark Driscol or Rick Warren.  He even got a group together to try to remove me as pastor.

Probably the biggest lightning rod in the Christian church today is Rick Warren.  There is no grey area with Rick.  People either like him or hate him.  Those who hate him are in the church!  I personally like him a lot. I don’t agree with everything he says but the man has had a huge impact on my life.  He actually sent me a hand written note a few year ago and I still have it today.

There are websites, books and even messages that sole purpose is to take down Rick Warren.  I don’t get it! They claim that Rick doesn’t preach the Gospel.  There was one man comparing him to Jim Jones!  Please! The rub for me is these people are spending so much time attacking other ministries that they probably are neglecting their own ministries to the unchurched right around them! 

There are many ministries that I disagree with. One being the Health/Wealth ministers.  But I have never said they weren’t believers or devoted websites to remove them.  I just chose not to attend there.  

I wonder what it looks like to those outside the church when they see Christians attacking their own?  I’ve often found more grace from those who aren’t believers.  It is time to retire the “CHURCH POLICE” and be on mission for Christ.

What do you think?

Yesterday I asked the question are Mormons Christians?  It seems that the Mormon sect desperately wants everyone to believe they are Christians.  The fact is that most Mormons are good, fine, upstanding, moral people.  In fact they often act like Christians.  Even worse, they act more like Christians than some Christians.

I’m an observer of culture.  It appears to me that many Christians want so desperately to be accepted by the world that they don’t even act like Christians.  What makes us different than the world?  Now there are some who go to far extremes and have their own little sub culture.  They will never change the culture because they avoid it.  But there are others that want to be hip and cool so they live like everyone else around them.

The divorce rate in the church is as high as those who aren’t beleivers.  Christians are involved in extra-marital affairs just like other people.  Christians lie, steal and cheat.  Famous Christian leaders are engaging in high profile sins.  Christians subsribe to HBO, Showtime, etc.. and go to sex filled, and profanity ladened movies.  Pornography is a dirty little secret that the church ignores.  Christians don’t act that much different than the rest of the world.  I believe some are stealing what it means to be a Christian.  Jesus didn’t die for our sins to give us a license to sin.

When it comes to faith, I’ve heard people say they believe in the 3 “F’s” (Faith, facts and figures).  That’s funny because Jesus didn’t live that way. Tell that to Peter who walked on water. The facts sure didn’t point to that happenng.  Tell that to Lazarus who was raised from being dead for over 3 days.  Who in their right mind thought that he would rise from the dead.  I don’t see much faith anymore.  Usually what I hear is remember when God did___________(fill in the blank)?  It usually something He did 10 years before.  I fell into that trap last fall and Craig Groeschel rocked my world by preaching a message called “Practical Atheisim” at Catalyst. His family was actually praying that all of us in that conference would be disturbed.  I couldn’t sleep for 3 days.  I realized that I was living by what I could do and not trusting God to move in only a way that He could.  I wanted my children to see God do something in our family while they were at home. I don’t want to tell stories about God moving–I want them to see God at work!

When is the last time you saw God move?  When is the last time you saw God do something in your life that only He could do?  Are you really living like a Christian?  I ask this question to myself as I write this.  I’m at a crisis of belief point in my life.  I’m having to truly rely on God to move.  The facts and figures don’t make sense, but Jesus wants me to follow Him not the facts and figures.

So are Christians really Christians?

What do you think?