Apr 08 2008
New Church Bulletin Bloopers!
•The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
•The sermon this morning: “Jesus Walks on the Water.” The sermon tonight: “Searching for Jesus.”
•Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 p.m. in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
•Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
•The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
•Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say “Hell” to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
•Miss Charlene Mason sang “I will not pass this way again,” giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
•For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
•Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
•The Rector will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing: “Break Forth Into Joy.”
•Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
•At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
•Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
•Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
•Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
•The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
•The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
•This evening at 7 p.m. there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
•Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 a.m. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.
Read more here.
[From me]
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In my first church I did the bulletin and one Sunday we were to sing “More Love to Christ”. Well, I accidentally typed “More Love to Chris”. The worship leader that Sunday made a good joke out of it. My wife and I had just been married about a month early and the worship leader says, “I guess Michelle is going to sing a solo this morning.”
I just saw a headline on Jay Leno last week from Crystal Cathedral (it looked legit) that said “Finding God’s Willy.”
Growing up my mom was the secretary at the church I was raised in and did the bulletin. The church men’s ministry was having an event - the food was provided, but every man was asked to “bring their own 2 liter of POOP” to share with everyone. Let’s just say…it was humorous!
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A church in Mississippi advertised their annual men’s wild game dinner as the annual “Breast Feast.”