Comments on: Would a hug have made a difference?

By: Francoise

Francoise — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 23:28:21 +0000

Thanks, Phil. I’ll rememebr that if ever I go there.

By: Phil Hoover

Phil Hoover — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 20:56:30 +0000

I lived in South Korea for one year. Those are very affection and warm, loving people.

Never had any problem hugging them. They enjoyed it, and so did I.

By: Francoise

Francoise — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 23:59:51 +0000

Hugging, I hate to say, is culturally unacceptable to some races, being seen as an atrocious intrusion and violation of their personal space, at best, and a spiritual contamination at worst.

Travelling throughout Asia, one learns to be VERY careful not to touch people, as we in the West do. I haven’t been to Korea, so can’t comment, but maybe Koreans feel icky about personal contact, too.

Don’t get me wrong- in those cultures, it’s fine for intimate family members to touch, but it’s a no-no for strangers. It’s hard, when visiting these places, not to stroke the heads of adorable native children, but doing so would invite a VERY hostile, and possibly lethal response from their parents. It would NOT be viewed as a friendly or admiring gesture at all!!

As I understand it, Cho came to USA as a refugee from Korea. Who knows what traumas these people have been though before they reach safety? Shouldn’t they be screened for possible psychological damage before being re-settled in a new country?

And, more importanly, shouldn’t the USA health authorities be notified and made to act if someone is obviously in need of help?

THANK YOU, KEVIN, FOR PUTTING IT BACK TO A WHITE PAGE!!!! My prayers were answered

By: Phil Hoover-Chicago

Phil Hoover-Chicago — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 16:30:21 +0000

Just a very poignant reminder…

Hug someone…and do it often!

I know those “hugs” have kept me from going crazy on more than one occasion.

By: Bryan Riley

Bryan Riley — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 14:51:39 +0000

I think it is that simple. I think it is as simple as being shown Who God Is. God is loving. God is personal. God is good. God is merciful. God is kind. He desires an intimate relationship with us and is waiting for us to lay down our false idols so that we will learn to rest in His strong, wonderful arms. That is the hug to which we need to be pointing everyone. Unfortunately, many who call themselves Christians aren’t even sure if that is the God they serve.

By: kevin bussey

kevin bussey — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 14:48:28 +0000

Amie,

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I think you are right. When I think about how cruel I was growing up…Uggh.

I thank God that the Holy Spirit transformed my heart. There are lots of hurting people in our communities–and yes in our churches.

I know that a hug isn’t going to make all of the difference. But I think what Scott was saying if years ago someone had showed him some love and attention. It is convicting to me.

By: Amie

Amie — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 14:43:23 +0000

Cho is not more evil than psychotic. He is a person who has problems as a child or teenager which needed to be identified and helped with early on. Sadly, the society we are living today have no sympathy/time/tolerant for the apparently weak/odd/silent ones - simply because they are not ‘good’ enough by sociel standards, not ‘fitting-in’ or well-equipped enough to fight back or defence themselves. His mental/psychological problems were deeply rooted, his behavioural patterns were formed by a long history of failure, rejections, frustrations and all kinds of negative experiences. What he needed was the slow process of building up geniune relationship with people again, before a Hug is meaningful to him. The fact is, we have a lot of people like Cho around us, who is shy, quiet, lonely, depressed, insecure…the least we can do is, suppress the urge to ignore or diminish them (sometimes a simple body language is already damaging), truly accept their presence. Think about Cho again when we see those people, we may well be able to prevent another tradegy like this happening again.

By: kevin bussey

kevin bussey — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 14:16:03 +0000

I apologize if I made it sound so simple. I agree with Scott that this goes way back. Look there are a lot of hurting people who keep quiet. Then they just explode. We must express love to each other.

BTW,

I listened to Francosie and MIT and changed back my template.

By: Scott

Scott — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 14:13:38 +0000

I understand the power of psychosis and mental illness. It’s important not to diminish or underestimate that.
But part and parcel with these types of disorders is the need for and understanding of the importance of early intervention. No one is suggesting that giving him a hug on Monday morning as he strolled out to begin his wanton slaughter would have slowed him.
My thought was that the tragedy of his life began long before Monday. Could early intervention have changed the tragic trajectory of his life? I don’t know but it should give us adequate pause to look around us for others who might need loving care.

By: Tom Bryant

Tom Bryant — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 12:10:17 +0000

I agree with the 2 smart people above me
Personally, I think that he was more evil than psychotic and he was plenty psychotic. And I don’t think hugs deal with that issue.

This isn’t to minimize the importance of hugs at all, especially for children.